VloggettyNO

(B I like that post title.
So today had been kinda BLERGH except for the fact that it's after-testing-before-final-project-grade-of-the-year-time OR, as I like to so expertly call it, ATBFPGOTYT. Which I do not believe has an acronym. PHAILbut anyways....
I feel like I should be falling apart right now, but I'm relatively calm. I just don't know anymore, really. I felt like things were getting better, I felt like someone threw a rope down for me to get out of the rut. You know? But I think I slipped on the way up and I can't find the rope anymore, because I'm back at aquare one and I don't know what the heck I'm doing. I know it sounds like emo-ism and I'm trying to make it sound better, but there's really no other way to say it. I'm BORED. And I have these secrets weighing me down, secrets I can't even post HERE, on a blog that no one even reads. The family is insane, as always, so I can't count on them for help, even my usually half-okay older sister. And that's just where it started when I fell back into the rut. My writing's gone. AGAIN. And somehow all my plans just fell apart and yet I keep making these empty promises to more and more people.
Wow this is getting depressing.
Well, guess what, it gets worse.
You know, with the economy thing going on, money is tough and businesses are struggling, which is why a lot of people think it's awesome that United will be merging with Continental Airlines to create the BIGGEST airline in the US- maybe the WORLD. Cool, right? As long as the gov'nt approves it, that is. But no. For my family and I, it ain't so hot. Because my dad just happens to be a mechanic working for Continental, and though he has pretty much close to the MOST seniority and DEFINITELY the most skill and work ethic out of these employees, when it comes down to the long run, that stuff doesn't count. We could be moved to another city, or he could get laid off. In which case we'd go broke, because my mom's job doesn't pay nearly enough for the five of us. Unless we sell Leah....
KIDDING.
Sort of.
B)
But anyways. Who knows? Maybe nothing will happen at all. For now, my mom says we won't know anything for practically a year. So why can't I relax? I dunno. Maybe I'm justed stressed in general because my grades are dropping.... BAD. That's something ELSE digging me into a ditch. Math and gym. WHO GETS A C IN GYM? HONESTLY. ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS SHOW UP.
*Sigh*
Like I said.... I just don't know anymore.
Besides that, happy things will be happening, which I'm hoping will distract me. My friends and I (who may or may not be separated soon. The best friends I've ever had, whom I only met LAST YEAR.........................................) have the roleplay notebooks for our original characters, which is great and tons of fun, but not exactly distracting. They are passed around just too quickly. And then we have the cedar point trip, which'll be fun BUT stressful because the girls I'm with don't seem to like me too much... they get bipolar with our friendship =\ And after that is THE most positive part of my future so far. The same friends (;_; dontthinkaboutitdontthinkaboutitdontthinkaboutit) and I have planned out this ENTIRE weekend right after the cedar point trip where we head out to this convention, stay at one's place overnight, head right back. We're going to ALL the panels and special events and meeting ALL the people we've obsessed over since seventh grade =) It'll be AWESOME! Now THAT'S something that can distract you from bad news, innnit? Especially when I need to get busy with mah cosplay ;D
Not hints. Pictures after the convention though. PROMISE!!! Hey. Maybe I'll even video a bit. Post it for ya when I get back.
For now, crossing my fingers that all goes well. Are you?